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Dec. 31st, 2037

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Aug. 20th, 2016

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"Can I harass you?"

Had the weirdest conversation on the waterfront today. A guy came up to me, and said "Hey pretty lady, I'm harassing everyone on the waterfront today. Can I harass you?" and I responded "No" and he went "Oh, okay" and being autistic I added "But, thank you" and meant it.

('cause, like, he was polite about it, and being called "pretty lady" is pleasant, and... I mean, he didn't really harass me? It was just a weird conversation?)

Also later had a guy just giggle and wave at me, and his buddy dared me to hug him.

Downtown is weird on a Saturday night >.>

Aug. 15th, 2016

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Laugh at the crazy

Today at the bus stop, I ran in to the most adorable crazy Christian lady. I was standing next to the newspaper vending machines, off to the side. Emphasis: off to the side. And she comes up to me and insists I move, gesturing at the newspaper machine. Which confuses me, because it opens from the front, not the side.

Apparently she was trying to get her phone, which she left on top of the machine. And she felt that taking two small steps around me was just far, far too unreasonable an effort. So she goes off on me. For not being a proper gentleman, and how she asked me to move. And I'm like, lady, two points: One, I'm female. Two, you could have taken two steps around me.

And I'm laughing because, I mean, "not a gentleman", for refusing to bow to her whims? And she can't even get my gender right? That's hilarious.

And then she goes off on how I'm "probably agnostic", like this is some sort of insult. And I just adore Portland's religious crazies, because they're a special breed of harmless and just... completely and totally off the rails. Like, I know I'm not having a rational conversation, so I can just enjoy scoring logical points and know that they'll all be ignored (her response was "blah blah blah", so yeah...)

I don't know what it is about me (although I blame Discordianism), but I really kinda love encounters like that. Like, I'd prefer these people not exist, and not bug me? But I was laughing for the entire bus ride, because it was just so wonderfully quixotic and absurd of her. Here's this self-confessed Christian insulting my weight, my religion, and my manners. And yet, here's this self-confessed Christian completely failing at manners, basic decency, or even the actual teaching of Christ (Matthew 25:40: "Verily I say unto you, inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.")

What a wild, crazy start to the day!
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Content > Happy

I realized today that Happy experiences consume spoons, in a way that merely feeling Content or Apathetic doesn’t. I don’t *want* to lead a happier life, because I don’t have the spoons to handle emotion more often.

Which took me a very long time to realize, because most of society seems to treat either Happiness or Productivity as being the only worthwhile goals.

But what I really want is a quiet little life that isn’t much of note.

Aug. 7th, 2016

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(no subject)

I have a new AIM account and am no longer actively following the old one. PM me for the info if you don't have it already :)

Jul. 29th, 2016

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The plural of Pidgey is apparently still Pidgey

"What is Discordianism?"
"Let me tell you a story. Tozan was asked by a young monk, 'What is Buddha?' Tozan replied, 'Three pounds of flax.'"
"So Discordianism is three pounds of flax?"
"No, of course not. Discordianism is three million Pidgey."
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Jul. 22nd, 2016

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Apophemancy

Apophenia. That all too human tendency to perceive meaningful patterns in random noise. Stare at the static on your TV long enough, and you'll see the number "3". If you use just the right combination of emoji, maybe you'll finally win her heart. Click the secret gem 7 times, and your drop rate will improve 10% in World Of Warcraft.

It often takes a while to realize you're actually dealing with the emergence of an Apophemancy talent. You're used to dismissing it as coincidences, but the patterns keep getting stronger, clearer. The static has a message, and only you can hear it.

Go on, try to explain that to your parents at age twelve. They think you're spying, reading through private journals, riffling through closets, sneaking a peak at their browsing history. There's no way a twelve year old knows these things. Maybe you're hanging out with the wrong sort of crowd?

But it gets stronger and stronger. Eventually it can't be denied. The chaos of the world, entropy itself, has been arranged specifically for your benefit. No one else sees the patterns, because they're not standing right where you are, coming from the places you did. A dove in the morning, the sound of rustling bushes on the drive to work, the groan of an oak tree as you drift off. None of it significant, but in the aggregate, you start to see patterns.

And the older you get, the bigger that aggregate, the more you understand.

The universe has a message. The universe has a million, billion messages. And you are it's chosen messenger. The universe can do naught but scream it out, hoping even one soul will hear that message, repeat it. That the idea will live on, long enough to find it's recipient.

I am the modern-day messenger of the gods. And they talk to me via these exciting sponsored messages.

Jul. 7th, 2016

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Assessors (#24)

I study the man in front of me. Good physique, an intriguing selection of skills, largely psychologically stable. "Construction", I say to the overseer, because I know construction workers are what we need. He'll do a good job of it, of course. I'm an Assessor, and I know my business well. But I also know he'd be happier working the kitchens.

The return of communism was a very unexpected aspect of superpowers. It turns out, Assessors are the perfect tool for it. "To each according to their need, from each according to their ability" is a lot more viable when you can assess someone's need and ability at a glance.

Unfortunately, the ability to see in to the souls of others does not automatically grant compassion - it's just as easy to use the power for exploitation. Knowing exactly how far you can push someone, what their abilities are really capable of... and exactly how little you need to pay them for all of this.

And, on the other hand, sometimes that push is what someone needs. When they don't believe in themselves, when they don't recognize their own potential... but even the most crippling of self-doubts fails to cloud an Assessor's vision.

Fortunately for the sanity of most people, the power is one of the rarer ones. A clear look at who you really are is not always a pleasant experience. And, the very presence of an Assessor makes it all too easy to forget about someone's future potential, valuing them instead solely for the abilities they already have. Why bother with training when you can just pick out those with talent, after all?

Jul. 3rd, 2016

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Traumatoportation (#23)

While the most famous examples could teleport away from danger, traumatoportation is actually the ability to teleport away from injury. The legendary David Colquhoun and Sean Gallard were actually Traumatoporters with the additional power of a limited precognitive / "danger sense" ability. It's also worth noting that the combination isn't a guaranteed aversion to danger: Stella Harcus had both precognition and traumataportation, but her visions were insufficient to trigger her power.

This power was probably significantly more useful in an era before cities. Involuntarily teleporting away from work every time you get a paper cut is awkward. So is explaining the situation to whoever inhabits the building you find yourself in. Fortunately the teleportation is usually short range, but a few people have found themselves hundreds or even thousands of kilometers from home every time they're injured.

Inconvenient, but the near invulnerability still makes it a decent exchange...

The power almost always manifests with safeguards - the user isn't teleported in to traffic, or floating above a canyon. Traffic lights can muddle the exact definition of "in traffic", but it's usually more embarassment and a few angry drivers than anything fatal.

These safeguards are relatively manifester-aware, too. Chiradet Pridi manifested traumaportation in combination with an invulnerability to most conventional threats, and caused more than a few traffic accidents and panicked calls to 911 when they manifested in the ostensibly safe-to-her environment of "a busy freeway", "floating above the Grand Canyon", etc..

Jul. 2nd, 2016

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Ottermancy (#22)

Technically it would be "OTRmancy", short for "Off The Record" (-mancy). Ottermancers have the ability to subtly tweak the minds of those they're conversing with, creating a true "off the record" conversation which the subject is incapable of sharing. In effect, guaranteed privacy. More powerful ottermancers can go so far as to ensure even their conversational partners can't access the memories - the ability to ask someone questions, and then wipe away memories of the conversation, so that they don't even know you asked.

In addition to the troubling similarities to mind control, most ottermancers can handle more conventional issues - disabling bugs, recording devices, surveillance cameras, etc.. Some are limited to devices they know about, others create impenetrable bubbles of privacy. It's believed that most ottermancers have at least one weakness to their powers - their subject can still write notes, or encode conversational details in their knitting, or an inability to disable visual cameras (and thus lip reading).

No one is sure quite why ottermancy is such a variable power. Included in this is a significantly higher rate of involuntary manifesters. While the privacy gains are convenient, it makes both employers and police nervous to deal with individuals who defy recordkeeping. In the most severe case, it took over a decade for the manifester (Susan Dowers of Albury, Australia) to be issued government ID, on the very reasonable basis that (a) no record of their existence could be found and (b) an ID itself qualified as a record and it took over a year to find a mancer who could make one that didn't immediately experience a total catastrophic failure to exist.

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